LAS: Retold Chapter 1

Chapter 1: The Saga Begins

Our story begins one summer day in the happy village of Toad Town where the famous heroes Mario and Luigi lived. They were relaxing in their house and brainstorming some ideas on what to do. Neither one knew it, but their rivals, Wario and Waluigi, were sneaking around outside and eavesdropping on them.
"Do you want to go golfing?" Mario asked.
"Nah." Luigi said. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you cheat."
"How about another party?"
"I'd rather not. Last time we played Shock Drop or Roll, I couldn't walk straight for a few turns. Remember?"
"Oh. Right. What about a kart race?"
"There's a word for that. Bor-ring."
Outside the house, Waluigi spoke up. "Hey Wario. Luigi sure seems bored."
"So?" Wario retorted. "What's your point?"
"We should totally do something evil to him." Waluigi replied.
"Evil, huh? Like what?"
"Actually, I don't know yet. Better keep listening."
Back inside, the older brother brings up something interesting. "Tennis?"
"Sure." Luigi laughed. "I'd love to smack you with the ball again!"
"What?" Mario said, feeling a bit offended. "You never did that before."
"Yeah I did." Luigi continued to laugh. "The last time we played on the hard court with Peach and Toad. I must've hit you about five times!"
"Oh baloney..."
"Let's make a bet then. Ten coins says I end up hitting you."
"Deal."
"And to make things more interesting, let's play on a different court. The ones around here are getting stale and predictable."
Luigi's last statement seems to gotten Waluigi's attention. "A new tennis court, huh?" he mused. "That gives me an idea!"
"And what idea would that be?" questioned Wario.
"Let's take Mario and Luigi to the new court that was finished a few days ago, the Waluigi Court."
"That's evil? Sounds like a pretty lousy plan to me..."
"Don't interrupt me! I saw a weather report on TV saying that there's supposed to be a storm tomorrow. The court is on an island roughly fifteen miles from here. I say we get Mario and Luigi on our ship and head out there. Then when the storm comes, we lock Luigi out of the cabin. We'll make it look like an accident!"
"That's more like it. But how are we gonna get them on the ship?"
"Heh. You leave that to me." Waluigi says slyly has he makes his way to the front door of the house.
"By the way, you watch too much TV."
"Oh yeah? Well you eat too much, you sit around the house all day and your hygiene is questionable. Now get over here!" Waluigi knocks on the door a couple of times. "Wario! Waluigi!" Mario said when he answered the door. "What are you two doing here?"
"I overheard you and Luigi talking about playing tennis." said Waluigi. "And you know how much I love that game."
"Mario!" Luigi called from the bedroom. "Who's at the door?"
"Oh, it's only Waluigi an-"
"Waluigi, huh?" Luigi interrupted as he rushes to the door. "You're here to cause some trouble, aren't you? I just learned Hyper Burn a few days ago and if you don't tell me why you're here, I'm gonna use it on you! And I warn you..." he continued, now in a threatening tone. "It's my most powerful attack yet."
"I just heard you...uh..." Waluigi stammered, not wanting the new move to be tested on him. "You were talking about playing on a new tennis court, right? Well, there's one that was just built called the Waluigi Court."
"Oh really? What picture is on it?"
"A picture of me of course. I'm flipping the bird. I'm telling you, the ball bounces so well on it that not even you can jump high enough to hit it."
"Now this I've gotta see!" Luigi's curiosity was beginning to get the better of him.
"So what exactly did you guys want?" Mario asked.
"Well." Waluigi explained. I thought it'd be a great idea if the four of us played a match or two on the Waluigi Court. It would be a doubles game. The Marios against the Warios. What do you say?"
"Where is this court? Is it far from here?" Mario continued with the questions.
"It's on an island a bit past Lavalava Island." answered Wario. "But we can easily get there with my ship."
"Sweet! Another chance to kick Waluigi's butt!" shouted an excited Luigi.
"Meet us at our house at 3 o' clock tomorrow." Waluigi stated matter-of-factly. "And bring some tennis balls. We might need some spares."
After having the details confirmed, Wario and Waluigi left. Mario closes the door and turns to Luigi. "Hey Luigi." he said. "You can't hit me with the ball if we're on the same team, can you?"
"I wouldn't recommend it anyway." Luigi chuckled as he grabbed his green Game Boy Color out of a dresser. "But I'll just change the bet slightly. Ten coins says I can peg Wario right in his fat pink nose. Anyway, I guess I'm in the mood for some Game Boy action now." He then settles down in a chair and switched the GBC on.
"What game are you working on?" Mario asked.
"Super Mario Bros. For Super Players."
"Hoo. That's a tough one. How far are you?"
"I'm stuck on 7-1..." Luigi said, getting frustrated with the game already. "I keep getting killed by the Hammer Bros. I'll figure it out eventually. Maybe I need some sugar in my system. Got any chocolate?"
Late the next morning, the brothers were sleeping on their bunk bed. Mario on top and Luigi on the bottom. Suddenly, the alarm clock went off. "Get up, you sissy! Or I'll break your arm!" the clock blared in a voice that sounded like Wario's. "Get up, you sissy! Or I'll break your arm!"
Mario was startled awake and fell out of bed. He stood up in a daze and hit a button on the clock. "I really hate that clock." he moaned.
"Well, what did you expect?" Luigi yawned. "It was a present from Wario."
"One of these days I'm gonna figure out how he made that recording so I can-"
"Mama mia!" Luigi cut Mario off. "It's eleven o' clock! I better make breakfast!"
Luigi went into the kitchen and began to prepare some pancakes and toast. Mario, however, went back to bed. A few minutes later, the telephone rang.
"Luigi...get the phone..." Mario murmured.
"My hands are full here!" he shouted back.
"Pick it up. I'm too comfortable."
"I said I'm busy! You get it!"
The phone continues to ring and Luigi gets fed up. "Fine. I'll pick up the phone, you fat piece of crap!"
"Cocky little freak!" was Mario's comeback.
Luigi dropped what he was doing and picked up the phone. Good thing too. It turns out that the call was for him.
"Hello Luigi." It was Daisy, the princess of Sarasaland. She and Luigi had only known each other for a few months, but they were already going out on dates. "Did you sleep in?"
"Yeah." Luigi confessed. "I did."
"I guess you forgot that we planned on going to the Royal Burger for breakfast today, huh?
"Aw geez. That was today?" Luigi was feeling guilty at this point. "I'm sorry. I was going to play tennis with Waluigi today."
"Ooh." said Daisy who took great pleasure in seeing Luigi pummel Waluigi in a match. "Let's try again next week. Okay?"
"Okay." Luigi agreed. "I swear this won't happen again. Good-bye now."
Luigi hung up the phone. During the conversation, Mario got out of bed and helped himself to a glass of orange juice.
"Oh, settle down." Mario scoffed before Luigi could complain.
"Pig." Luigi said under his breath.
Meanwhile, trouble was brewing at Wario and Waluigi's house as the duo discussed their plan for taking out Luigi while they watched a weather report on TV.
"Looks like that's gonna be one heck of a storm." said Wario.
"It should hit at around 4 o' clock." Waluigi said as he looked at his watch. "It's quarter to three. Those bumbling brothers should be here anytime now. Anyway, I've got everything planned. We just walk to the Toad Town Port and sail set like normal. When the storm comes, we both run into the cabin and lock the door. It should be hook, line and sinker for Luigi."
"One problem: Mario. Obviously he's gonna try to do something to stop us. Got a plan for that?"
"Sure I do. I'm the smart one, remember? Anyway, it goes like this..." Waluigi explained his second plan to Wario in a hushed tone. There was a knock at the door just as he finished.
"Hey." greeted Mario. "Sorry we're a little late. Luigi just had to bring his Game Boy Color."
Mario moved off to the side so Wario could see Luigi, who was playing and muttering complaints. "Don't mind me." was all he said.
"But hey." Mario continued "I got those spare tennis balls like you wanted. I also brought my van here so we can all-"
"Thanks, but we're walking." Waluigi came up from behind Wario. "Wario's fat butt needs a little exercise anyway!"
"My butt is just fine!" shouted an offended Wario.
"Well, okay then. Let's go." said Mario.
"Yup. Come along, Lard Butt!" sneered Waluigi.
"That's not funny!" Wario bellowed.
The evil brothers step outside and close the door, then all four of them walk to the Toad Town Port.
Mario looked at the many ships that were docked there. "Hey Wario. Is that one yours?" he asked while pointing out a yellow ship.
"Yup." the yellow-clad fellow said. "That's mine all right."
"What did you expect? It looks like him!" Waluigi laughed.
Mario seemed to have liked the joke and laughed as well.
Luigi, however, was in a less than jolly mood. Some dark clouds in the sky caught his attention. "Uh...Waluigi?" he said, sounding a bit worried. "I think I see some rain clouds. Can we go some other day?"
"Don't worry about that." Waluigi said. "I'm sure it's only by the docks. We'll be fine. So how about that game, eh? Getting excited?"
"Well, I guess." Luigi answered, still not so sure about the idea.
"Heh. Let's see you get to the game." Wario said to himself.
"Did you say something, Wario?" Mario asked.
"Oh. I said let's get to the game!"